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april 2024

scotland trip soundtrack

One Art
Elizabeth Bishop

The art of losing isn't hard to master;
so many things seem filled with the intent
to be lost that their loss is no disaster.

Lose something every day. Accept the fluster
of lost door keys, the hour badly spent.
The art of losing isn't hard to master.

Then practice losing farther, losing faster:
places, and names, and where it was you meant
to travel. None of these will bring disaster.

I lost my mother's watch. And look! my last, or
next-to-last, of three loved houses went.
The art of losing isn't hard to master.

I lost two cities, lovely ones. And, vaster,
some realms I owned, two rivers, a continent.
I miss them, but it wasn't a disaster.

—Even losing you (the joking voice, a gesture
I love) I shan't have lied. It's evident
the art of losing's not too hard to master
though it may look like (Write it!) like disaster.

i charged my switch for the first time in years and got back into animal crossing!!

march 2024

À une passante
Charles Baudelaire

La rue assourdissante autour de moi hurlait.
Longue, mince, en grand deuil, douleur majestueuse,
Une femme passa, d’une main fastueuse
Soulevant, balançant le feston et l’ourlet;

Agile et noble, avec sa jambe de statue.
Moi, je buvais, crispé comme un extravagant,
Dans son oeil, ciel livide où germe l’ouragan,
La douceur qui fascine et le plaisir qui tue.

Un éclair... puis la nuit! — Fugitive beauté
Dont le regard m’a fait soudainement renaître,
Ne te verrai-je plus que dans l’éternité?

Ailleurs, bien loin d’ici! trop tard! jamais peut-être!
Car j’ignore où tu fuis, tu ne sais où je vais,
O toi que j’eusse aimée, ô toi qui le savais!

mirror selfie. i walk down this street every day :)

← here he's talking about the city of paris personified; the context was the haussmannien renovations that the parisians back then hated because although now the city is much more organised and beautiful, at the time it turned the whole of paris into a dusty, noisy construction site...

sunday football :D

been listening to Overcompensate by twenty one pilots a lot lately
Two nights of tragicomedy. At one point we messed up the scene order which almost gave me a panic attack, although with some quick thinking & retconning the audience didn't notice at all (phew!)

This little mishap was ultimately balanced out by the background music (an instrumental version of Street Spirit by Radiohead) ending the very moment Caesar delivers the last line of the play :

"And then—to Rome."

my friend & i, yassified romanised to maintain anonymity
saw you my lord?
-no, lady.
Antony and Cleopatra, Act I scene ii

february 2024

the longest ever shortest month...
holidays were a daze, the most fun i had was picking sticks in the forest, got a new bracelet.

lots of rainy days
&
sleeping late

frames from a comic

inspired by hozier's song in the woods somewhere

went fabric shopping at montmartre with my friends!
revising Antony and Cleopatra

Reflections
R. S. Thomas

The furies are at home
in the mirror; it is their address.
Even the clearest water,
if deep enough can drown.

Never think to surprise them.
Your face approaching ever
so friendly is the white flag
they ignore. There is no truce

with the furies. A mirror's temperature
is always at zero. It is ice
in the veins. Its camera
is an X-ray. It is a chalice

held out to you in
silent communion, where gaspingly
you partake of a shifting
identity never your own.

january 2024

i'm going back to Minnesota where sadness makes sense
Danez Smith

o California, don't you know the sun is only a god
if you learn to starve for her? i'm over the ocean

i stood at its lip, dressed in down, praying for snow.
i know, i'm strange, too much light makes me nervous

at least in this land where the trees always bear green.
i know something that doesn't die can't be beautiful.

have you ever stood on a frozen lake, California?
the sun above you, the snow & stalled sea--a field of mirror

all demanding to be the sun, everything around you
is light & it's gorgeous & if you stay too long it will kill you.

it's so sad, you know? you're the only warm thing for miles
the only thing that can't shine.

<- lunar new year card to my grandparents